8 Nov 2017

How To Deal With Elderly Resistance

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If you are involved with elder care in Toronto, you have most likely encountered some resistance from your parent or loved one. It could be something simple like not wanting to leave the house as much as they used to, or more troubling issues like insisting on driving when it’s time to quit.

 How To Deal With Elderly Resistance

Whatever issues you are facing, we will give you some pointers on how to deal with elderly resistance.

Get To The Bottom Of The Resistance

Regardless of the seriousness of the resistance, finding the cause is a good place to start. Try to figure out why they are being stubborn. This can help you as the caregiver understand and empathize with the situation, and ultimately to overcome their resistance.

Some common causes of resistance are:

  • Pride—they can’t handle certain tasks any longer or need extra help
  • Guilt about being a burden to family
  • Anger at their situation and growing old
  • Fear of losing independence
  • Denial that they actually need some help

Once you determine the real cause of their resistance, you can verbally empathize and be supportive. Let them know you understand what they are feeling. Try to be flexible in finding a middle ground, and most importantly, don’t take it personally.

Accentuate The Positive

Discuss what activities they can still do independently. Perhaps they are still able to prepare their meals or do the laundry. List all the normal activities they can manage, but then have them tell you what is starting to become more difficult, like paying the bills or climbing stairs. If they can admit some problem areas, then you may be able to reach a compromise.


You can’t be there all the time. Elder care in Toronto performed by loving relatives like you can eventually become too much to handle. If your loved one resists having outside professional help, suggest a bargain.

Propose a trial period to engage professional elder care services and explain that you need some support. Most likely they will want you to be happy and they will agree. If they are unhappy after that agreed-upon period, tell them you will revisit the arrangement.

For Dementia Patients

When dementia is added to the equation of elder care resistance, there are other things to consider. Patients suffering with dementia commonly have mood swings, personality changes and memory issues. This can exacerbate the resistance and make it even more difficult to get acceptance.

This may be the time you need to get the support of those professionally trained to care for dementia patients or any loved one resisting additional health care.

Consider C-Care Health Services to help you with home care for your loved one.

Their trained professionals are accustomed to resistance and will help your loved one and you work through these issues together. Their clinical knowledge, skills and judgement will lighten the burden on you and keep your loved one safe and comfortable.

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